Boomer update your vocabulary

Getting older hasn’t been that hard; being old is.  But recently I aged a decade or two as the result of something my daughter wrote. 
People’s words can have this affect.  It’s like the first time the cashier at the store said, “Can I help you sir?” 
I looked around to see who he might be talking to.  I was definitely not old enough to be a “sir”.  And at a different store but with the same affect, “How about you let me carry those out for you gramps.” 
You will definitely know you are getting old when you become invisible to the teenagers at the restaurant.  One specific time I was with my two handsome sons and the hostess didn’t even know I was alive. 
When asking if she could take my order, she wasn’t looking at me.  And when I went to pay, she didn’t look once in my direction as she ran my credit card. 
I wanted to shake her and say, “Hey you.  Eyes right here.  I am speaking.  I am the one with the money, not these two unemployed college students.”  I was invisible.
There are other reminders of your age, like suddenly you are getting lots of medication adds, or you have frequent conversations with Social Security or Medicare, or funeral homes keep sending you funeral insurance plans.
So how could I age two decades in a minute?  My daughter (who will remain nameless, but is married to Alex) wrote in a post, if I knew what the following statements were. 
“You’re an NPC.”  “Take the Big L”  “She ate and left no crumbs.” “Sigma”.  “Skibidi Ohio Rizz”.  “Rizzly Bear”.  “Main character energy”.  “Taylor Swift is a brat”  “Brat”.  “Bussin”  “IYKYK.”  “Cheugy”.
“If you don’t understand anything I just wrote, you’re not alone.  You know who does though?  Your middle school kids do.  
“And your kid’s middle school teacher probably does too.  In addition to trying to teach those adorable, hormonal, chaos gremlins math, science, and/or English, the middle school teachers have to learn a new language every few years.” 
And as responsible parents you should too.
Teenagers use an ever-changing slang to communicate, and adults generally don’t get it. 
If you don’t know what an emoji, meme, post, or sticker is, you need to have your kids disconnect your computer from the internet because it is likely you are going to be scammed or access an internet site that a person with a pacemaker should not be viewing. 
When I say, “fall for a phishing scheme” and you think falling and not being able to get back up, or going fishing with Bubba and a six pack of Pepsi; have your kids disconnect you from the internet.
If you remember using words that your parents didn’t understand like “groovy” “far out” “I need some bread” or here comes the “fuzz”, have your kids disconnect your computer from the internet.  “Do you dig it?”
That is why old people look at teenagers and ask each other “What did he say?”  Or they get a text from their grandkids and have no idea how to respond so they give a “thumbs up” or use “lol” and figure that covers most anything. 
If the grandparents are on a mission they usually just say, “Remember I love you and Jesus loves you” and hope for the best.
We have to update your vocabulary from the “groovy” Woodstock.   Walter Cronkite said “And that’s the way it is” to assure us each night that the world was safe and “the man” was clearly in control of things.  Maybe it was, I dunno, “that’s the way is wuz” but it ain’t that way anymore.  Dig it?
How about we help you out with some of the slang. 
Bussin – amazing, fantastic, lovely and cool. 
Bet – agreed or okay. 
Sigma – a cool dude. 
Rizz – an ability to charm and woo a person. By the way derived from charisma. 
NPC - non-player character – an internet meme for a person that blindly follows trends.
Take the big-L – they didn’t succeed or achieve their desired outcome, take the loss. 
Main character energy – someone who wants or is the center of attention. 
Cheugy – out of date. 
IYKYK (okay I will let you practice with that one).
TBH I won’t even get into all the slang used for drugs and sex that kids use these days.  But if you have kids, you better learn to communicate because they are exposed earlier and are having these conversations with someone.
It’s important to educate yourself about common teen slang so that you can talk with them, not just talk to them, and so you will know what your teenager is talking about…both online and IRL.